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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* A single ticket won Wednesday's $425 million Powerball jackpot drawing. The winner will receive a ceremonial 8-foot-by-12-foot check. We should use those huge checks to pay our MUD bills this winter.
* The winning lottery ticket was sold in Central California. Say, President Obama was just in Central California; it sounds like maybe he's come up with a way to fund Obamacare.
* Omaha's caught in a cycle of cold weather followed by warm weather, then cold and then warm. I have a new hobby: I stand in the middle of the street and watch potholes form before my eyes.
* Initially, the weather forecasters called for 1-3 inches of snow Thursday. That was changed to 3-5 inches. Then, the time frame was pushed back several hours. There's a new saying, "If you don't like the weather forecast in Nebraska, wait five minutes and it'll change."
* During the demolition and construction of the Crossroads Village, the Barnes and Noble store would have to close or relocate. This will pretty much leave the metro area with hundreds of thousands of people and two bookstores.
* Gordon Lightfoot will play the Holland Center on March 20. Grandparents, make a deal with the kids: You will take 'em to see Miley Cyrus, but they have to go to Gordon Lightfoot with you.
* According to TeamRankings.com, there's a 0.0398-percent chance the Husker men's basketball team makes the Final Four. Coincidentally, those are the same odds of my NCAA Tourney bracket beating The World-Herald librarian's bracket.
* A new "Robocop" movie is out. I'm beginning to think filmmakers are running out of fresh ideas. In this one, he fights Rocky.
* President Obama is in Mexico for the North American Leaders' Summit. Acrimony in Washington, D.C., is so bad, Republican leaders told him, "Have a good time in Mexico and drink lots of water."
* Michelle Obama gave some advice to Justin Bieber's parents on ABC. Let's hope the administration doesn't take on trying to fix Bieber. You think revamping the health-care system is challenging...
* If the Obamas can fix Bieber, peace in the Middle East should be a piece of cake.
* Columbus, Ohio, and Las Vegas are vying for the 2016 GOP convention. In Las Vegas, Republicans risk being linked to gambling and prostitution, but in Columbus, they'd be linked to something worse: the Ohio State football program.
* Columbus, Ohio, is a front-runner to host the 2016 GOP convention. The big concern is that Urban Meyer steps in front of the Republicans' choice and shouts: "I'll do it! I'll run for president!"
* Sen. Rand Paul said that unless Republicans adapt, Texas could become a blue state. I always thought that by the time Texas ever became a blue state, pigs would fly past the Capitol rotunda.