Brad Dickson’s Bottom 10, Nov. 18 -
Published Sunday, November 17, 2013 at 10:02 pm / Updated at 10:21 pm
Brad Dickson’s Bottom 10, Nov. 18

To provide perspective on how this season has gone for college football’s downtrodden, the most popular yell squad cheer during the weekend: “At this point, why even bother, clap clap!”

1. Southern Mississippi (0-10): The Golden Eagles vault to No. 1 after a 41-7 drubbing by Florida Atlantic, Southern Mississippi’s 22nd straight loss. Don’t think of it as being No. 1 in the Bottom 10, think of it as sort of a lifetime achievement award.

2. Miami (Ohio) (0-9): Miami lost to Kent State 24-6. The RedHawks appear to have given up on winning a game and seem content to merely score.

3. Massachusetts (1-9): The Minutemen are edged by Akron 14-13 in a game that kept the five people interested in the outcome on the edge of their seats until the end.

4. Western Michigan (1-10): Western Michigan lost to Central Michigan on Saturday. It lost to Eastern Michigan last weekend. The Broncos could actually put together a miserable season without ever leaving the state.

5. Purdue (1-9): Saying that Purdue has had a rough season is like saying that the Miami Dolphins offensive line has experienced some mild dysfunction.

6. Georgia State (0-10): Don’t be too hard on the Panthers, who have only had a program for three years. The team is still operating on a learner’s permit.

7. Connecticut (0-9): In the wake of the Washington Redskins nickname discussion, sled dogs are now demanding that UConn lose the name “Huskies.”

8. California (1-10): The Bears lost to Colorado in Boulder. In the ultimate show of disrespect, Buffaloes fans decided to hold their snowballs for a better team.

9. FIU (1-9): Since the lone FIU victory was over Southern Mississippi, technically the team only has half a win this season.

10. Hawaii (0-10): It appears Hawaii may just be going through the motions. I’m basing this on the offense wearing leis during a potential game-tying drive against San Diego State on Saturday.

Others receiving votes: UAB, Eastern Michigan, pulled groins, “Husker turnover-mania,” Temple, Tulsa, the Kitten Bowl, all TV weathercasters, Iowa State, Kentucky, New Mexico State.

Contact the writer: Brad Dickson    |   402-444-1019    |  

Brad comments in a funny way on topical events in the news and the wide world of sports.

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