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Brad's afternoon edition. Click here to read Brad's morning jokes.
* The Obama administration has called in the "A Team" to fix the Affordable Care Act website. The way this thing is going, "A Team" means Mr. T is now in charge. "I pity the fool that don't have health insurance!"
* President Obama has encouraged Americans to bypass the website and sign up for health care by phone. "Calls will be answered in the order in which they were received. There are 8 million and 197 callers ahead of you."
* Obama has asked Americans to sign up for health care by calling a government hotline. To give give you an idea how bad our financial problems are, it's a 900-number.
* You can also apply in person. About 30 million Americans are expected to do so. You think the line at the DMV is long.
* Ex-"American Idol" winner Kelly Clarkson was married. Simon Cowell showed up to criticize the bride, the groom and all the ushers.
* The mayor of Boston called on the Red Sox to win the World Series "cup." Politicians in this country need to stick to governing. No, we really don't want that either.
* Members of the Boston Red Sox have been offered money to shave their beards. Not by a charity -- no, by me, so I don't have to look at them during the World Series.
* Colorado residents called 911 after a man was spotted dangling from a hot-air balloon. It turns out it was just Southwest Airlines testing a new $99 super-saver discount fare.
* Space experts argue “Gravity” is not 100-percent accurate, starting with real people sent into space usually don’t look anything like George Clooney and Sandra Bullock.
* Miley Cyrus is going to perform at the MTV-Amsterdam Awards. OK, if she violates decency standards in Amsterdam, we’ll know there’s a problem.
* The lead actor has dropped out of “Fifty Shades of Grey.” So, I guess he finally found time to read the book.
* Advil has been named the official pain reliever of the NHL. This is the second most lucrative endorsement deal, next to being the official bail bondsman of the NFL.
* Dennis Rodman claims Kim Jong Un asked him to train the North Korean basketball team for the 2016 Olympic Games. This will be the first Olympic basketball team to show up in wedding gowns and green hair.
* Rodman also plans to take a group of former U.S. professional athletes to North Korea. This will be good for the North Korean people: to meet some people more impoverished than themselves.