Breaking Brad: Sooners look squeaky clean amid Oklahoma State allegations -
Published Monday, September 23, 2013 at 12:30 pm / Updated at 12:32 pm
Breaking Brad: Sooners look squeaky clean amid Oklahoma State allegations

Brad Dickson's humor column, "Breaking Brad," appears daily on and in The World-Herald. To read more from Brad, check out his past columns at and follow him on Twitter.

* * * * * * * * * *

Brad's afternoon edition. Click here to read Brad's morning jokes.

* Monday Night Football features the Oakland Raiders at Denver. Of course, the big question: Can Raiders fans adjust to breaking the law at altitude?

* An actress from "Nurse Jackie," Merritt Wever, won an Emmy and gave an 11-word acceptance speech. How fast can we elect her to Congress?

* You're familiar with the Emmys? It's the awards ceremony where the jewelry is real and the people are fake.

* The people at the Emmys made Miley Cyrus look overdressed at the Video Music Awards.

* Pope Francis denounced the idolatry of money. I believe the rebuttal is at 6 p.m. on CNBC.

* “Building Hope” is the theme for the current school year in Westside Community Schools. I believe the OPS theme is: “Anybody know who's superintendent?”

* Either that or, “A full inch of snow? Cancel school.”

* The president of Iran wrote an op-ed for the Washington Post in an attempt to improve relations with the U.S. The Iranian president still doesn't get it. He said unless the op-ed gets 20,000 views online, he's gonna start taking hostages.

* Sen. John McCain is feuding with members of the Los Angeles Dodgers. With the government on the brink of shutting down, trouble in Syria and a historic debate over Obamacare, at least members of the Senate are focusing on what really matters.

* There were long lines outside Apple stores all weekend to buy the new iPhones. The best thing is, after purchasing an iPhone, you can go to the back of the line and wait to purchase the new model that will replace it in a few weeks.

* Oklahoma State boosters allegedly paid football players. Did you ever think there'd come a day when Oklahoma is the cleanest program in the state?

* Oklahoma State players were allegedly paid for a summer job where all they did was fish. Players at Alabama, Auburn and Georgia said, “And the problem is ...?”

* According to a report, Rex Ryan, in pregame remarks to his team, once threatened to punch Bill Belichick in the face when they met before the game. This sounds like the first NFL pregame show I'd be interested in watching.

* Fortunately, Belichick overheard the remarks on the hidden mics he keeps in the visitors' locker room and didn't go to midfield.

Contact the writer: Brad Dickson    |   402-444-1019    |  

Brad comments in a funny way on topical events in the news and the wide world of sports.

After all his bluster and bravado in the courtroom, Nikko Jenkins found guilty of 4 murders
New UNO center strengthens ties between campus, community
Senate candidate Shane Osborn to include anti-tax activist Norquist in telephone town hall
Teen killed at Gallagher Park was shot in head as he sat in SUV, friend who was wounded says
PAC funded by Senate candidate Ben Sasse's great-uncle releases Shane Osborn attack ad
High school slam poets don't just recite verses, 'they leave their hearts beating on the stage'
Attorney: Man accused of trying to open plane's door needs psychiatric evaluation
49-year-old sentenced to 40-50 years for attempted sex assault of child
Brothers looking for pot sentenced for violent home invasion
At Boys Town panel, experts stress it's never too early to educate children
Kelly: New $24M UNO center embodies spirit of newlywed crash victim
Gov. Heineman calls 2014 a 'very good year for Nebraska taxpayers'
Ex-Iowan behind landmark free speech case recounts story in Bellevue
Arrest made in teen's shooting death at Benson's Gallagher Park
Section of 50th Street to close for bridge demolition
Rather than doing $250K in repairs, owner who lives in lot behind 94-year-old house in Dundee razes it
Plans for new $16M YMCA in Council Bluffs at 'critical juncture'
Woodmen request would take nearly $40M in valuation from tax rolls
With fixed AC, Fort Calhoun's nuclear station ends brief shutdown
Windy day could make driving difficult on east-west roads
Richard Brown steps down as Charles Drew Health Center CEO
OPD safety expo set for April 26
Database: How much did Medicare pay your doctor?
Crew working to disassemble International Nutrition plant
New public employee pay data: Douglas, Lancaster, Sarpy Counties, plus utilities
< >
Kelly: Creighton's McDermotts put good faces on an Omaha tradition
A comical roast Wednesday night in Omaha brought fans of Creighton basketball laughter by the bucketful. This time it was McJokes, not McBuckets, that entertained the Bluejay crowd.
Kelly: New $24M UNO center embodies spirit of newlywed crash victim
Jessica Lutton Bedient was killed by a drunken driver at age 26 in 2010. Thursday, the widowed husband and other family members will gather with others at the University of Nebraska at Omaha to dedicate a permanent memorial to Jessica.
Breaking Brad: How much would you pay for a corn dog?
The Arizona Diamondbacks have a new concession item: a $25 corn dog. For that kind of money, it should be stuffed with Bitcoin.
Breaking Brad: Pothole repair crew gets stuck in a pothole
In East Lansing, Mich., a pothole repair crew got stuck inside a pothole. How did this not happen in Omaha?
Breaking Brad: What do the moon, Colorado senators have in common?
How about that "blood red" moon Monday? It was as red as the eyes of a Colorado legislator.
Deadline Deal thumbnail
Dr. Welbes Natural Health Clinic
$129 for 2 LipoLaser Sessions with Additional Complimentary Services ($605 value)
Buy Now
< >
Omaha World-Herald Contests
Enter for a chance to win great prizes.
OWH Store: Buy photos, books and articles
Buy photos, books and articles
Travel Snaps Photo
Going on Vacation? Take the Omaha World-Herald with you and you could the next Travel Snaps winner.
Click here to donate to Goodfellows
The 2011 Goodfellows fund drive provided holiday meals to nearly 5,000 families and their children, and raised more than $500,000 to help families in crisis year round.
Want to get World-Herald stories sent directly to your home or work computer? Sign up for's News Alerts and you will receive e-mails with the day's top stories.
Can't find what you need? Click here for site map »