Breaking Brad: Bo Pelini, Bigfoot and more Bo Pelini - Omaha.com
Published Tuesday, September 17, 2013 at 9:41 am / Updated at 9:46 pm
Breaking Brad: Bo Pelini, Bigfoot and more Bo Pelini

Brad Dickson's humor column, "Breaking Brad," appears daily on Omaha.com and in The World-Herald. To read more from Brad, check out his past columns at omaha.com/dickson and follow him on Twitter.

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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.

* Bob Kerrey has sold the remodeled Dundee house he paid $220,000 a year ago for $395,000. He's the first documented professional house-flipper to run for U.S. Senate.

* Bob Kerrey has sold his Omaha home. Everybody in Omaha surprised by this will be meeting this evening in the back seat of a smart car.

* I didn't get a chance to follow the news out of Lincoln on Monday. Anything interesting happen with the Husker football program?

* On Monday morning, Bo Pelini ruffled feathers when he said the program doesn't need Tommie Frazier, and, in the afternoon, an embarrassing audiotape surfaced from 2011. This is the university's new “incremental policy” --- one scandal in the morning, one in the afternoon.

* The Bo Pelini audio has been compared to the Nixon Tapes, with the major difference being the Nixon Tapes just brought down a president. We're talking the Nebraska football coach here.

* The good news: UNL Chancellor Harvey Perlman has placed a curse jar in Pelini's office, so now Perlman won't have to raise tuition every eight months.

* Husker fans are offended by Bo's use of the “f” word -- “fair-weather.”

* I long for the simpler times of last week when the biggest football scandal around here was Millard high school students wearing Speedos and socks to games.

* An audiotape emerged from 2011 of Bo Pelini cursing Husker fans and World-Herald reporters and columnists. At one point, Bo runs out of World-Herald sports reporters to curse and moves on to Momaha.com.

* Pelini referenced “fair-weather” Husker fans. Next time you're huddled with 91,184 other people in Memorial Stadium in the sleet in 2-degree weather in late November, remember: you're fair-weather.

* On the tape, Bo's cursing so much, the National Association of Longshoremen issued a statement condemning him.

* Earlier Monday, responding to Tommie Frazier's critical tweets, Pelini said, “We don't need him.” In Nebraska, Pelini may have been better off trashing sandhills cranes.

* Mayor Jean Stothert and former Fire Chief Mike McDonnell reached an exit agreement that's not as favorable for McDonnell. This is reminiscent of when the guy on “Let's Make A Deal” turned down curtain No. 1 that had the new car and picked curtain No. 2 that had the mini-vac and potato peeler.

* Right now, the big concern is that with the Bo Pelini audiotapes, his remarks about Tommie Frazier and the Stothert-McDonnell exit agreement, that the comments section on Omaha.com will explode.

* It's reported that a UFO was spotted over Lincoln on Sept. 4 and photographed by a Lincoln TV station. The UFO was going to come to Omaha but couldn't figure out all our road construction and detours.

* An interesting factoid: Even if tiny, green men had emerged from the UFO in the middle of the report, the Lincoln newscast still would've allotted 20 minutes for weather.

* I guess the UFO landed at the Lincoln Airport on a weekday and reported no signs of life on Earth.

* Omaha's credit rating has been downgraded. Between all the roadwork and the lowered credit rating, it's reached the point where MECA board members are glad they live outside the city limits.

* A hunter claims to have found Bigfoot tracks in the Loess Hills outside Council Bluffs. Officials were going to evacuate Mall of the Bluffs, but there wasn't anybody there anyway.

* Bigfoot is becoming ubiquitous in the area. On Sunday, he led the Corporate Cup run for the first four miles.

Want more Brad? Scroll through his author archive here.

Contact the writer: Brad Dickson

brad.dickson@owh.com    |   402-444-1019    |  

Brad comments in a funny way on topical events in the news and the wide world of sports.

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